Internet Gems 19
He’s trying to survive his wife’s Pinterest phase and hoping his current living nightmare was spurred by a simple hormonal imbalance after her last pregnancy. He whimpers in his car sometimes, alone. But he paints a smile — this smile — on his face when with his family. He’s a hero. He’s a dad.
For years we have been tortured by headlines touting the impending end of sweet, comforting, parental-love-substituting chocolate as we know it. Much like how our generally bee-free lifestyle has been jeopardized by the threat of those africanized killer bees, which were supposed to buzz in and destroy our way of life before the year 2000 — […]
We see these stories from time to time: A 103-year-old man attributes his long life to all the bourbon with which he washes down his pipe smoke (okay, mister). A lady credits reaching 102-years-strong to the McDonald’s cheeseburgers she eats everyday (sure thing, granny). A 101-year-old “stubborn jerk who will outlive all our favorite relatives” heralds getting into screaming matches […]
Happy Valentime’s Day weekend! Last February, while sitting in a body shop’s waiting room, I overheard an Auto Body Repair Technician ask the receptionist if she had plans for “Valentime’s Day.” I thought maybe I had misheard him or he had misspoke out of nervousness while chatting up the beguiling ice princess manning the front […]